Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Goodbye Steak, Hello Refried Beans


Goodbye Steak, Hello Refried Beans

So, you hear from the get-go about the nausea and food aversions you are likely to come across now that you are growing a placenta and other formidable things, however nobody really tells you (can they?) what it feels like. For example, steak. Yes, one of my favourite, carnivorous indulgences – the rear of a cow, done bleu (or for those non-steak-lovers – extremely rare!) but of course warm through the middle; this strange steak-love is brought to you courtesy of my Dad, who has instilled in me from a young age the importance of having your steak moo-ing. Usually I would be hoeing into a steak once a week at minimum, but since getting knocked up, two things have happened.

1: I am no longer allowed to eat rare steak, therefore rendering my love of steak incalculably less than originally thought.
2: The smell of meat (Steak, ham, mince, chicken, pork roast, bacon, rissoles, freaking ANYTHING that used to be alive) makes me want to vomit. 

So my question to the world: WHYYYYYYYYYY?!?!

Why, when we are told that iron and protein are invaluable to our diet when we are growing another human, does our body reject all that is good? And, furthermore, why does it have to be STEAK?! Why can’t I be hating on celery, the food that taste forgot?

But it didn't stop there, no. As soon as my aversion to fresh meat kicked in, it’s like my hormones thought... "Aww, we feel so bad for taking away your reason to live, we’ll give you another food fetish to tide you over..."

Enter, Refried beans (sans chilli).
I have been eating them on EVERYTHING!!!! On plain corn chips, on baked potatoes, in soups, in curries, in tacos, basically, anything I can replace meat with, refried beans has done the replacing.

One morning, when I realised I wanted to eat refried beans on toast for breakfast, made up a little ditty;

I like my beans both here and there,
I like my beans upon the stair,
For breakfast, lunch, and in-betweens,
I must, I must, eat refried beans!

On baked potatoes, mashed with peas,
Instead of steak, instead of cheese,
For horrible, hormonal scenes,
I must, I must eat refried beans!

It pains me to say I have changed my diet from healthy meat, potatoes and veg, to turning each meal into something that looks like poop. Awesome. Thanks, hormones, you only make life better. (Strangely, I suppose, refried beans have quite a bit of protein in them, so at least we’re getting some form of healthy alternative and I’m not craving doughnuts.) 

On another note; told my fabulous hubby I was feeling gross and could only stomach potatoes, and he brought home curry and doughnuts. Bless his little cotton socks for trying, but neither of those things will make it down my oesophagus. At least, they won’t stay down there for long.

So, Steak, for now it is Ciao but not goodbye, for I will see and eat you in the future and I will enjoy it like the carnivore that I am. To all you cows out there, consider this the eye of the storm.

Peace xxxx

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